hope you have a costco

WARNING: Product endorsement coming your way!

Ok, I'm generally not one to use our blog to advertise the fab things we come across, but I just gotta do it this time.

Back story: We spent Christmas at M's brother's house in Brighton, Michigan. With our 2 new kids, we currently have the most "team members" in the clan. As a result, we were bestowed the privilege of sleeping in the master suite -- king-sized bed with a king-sized bathroom. The first night we realized what a bonus we really had: The sheets on the bed were to die for. They weren't just flannel sheets; it was more like they were soft, warm blankets. We loved, loved, loved them! According to our seester-in-law, they were flannel sheets from Costco. Well, you know where we were headed!

So, on Sunday M heads to Costco for said sheets. He calls me up with a little surprise. Not only do they have the totally groovy flannel sheets we were looking for, but they also had FLEECE sheets!!

Jesus, Jose, y Maria!!

Just to be safe we bought one of each. Last night we washed the fleece set and put them on the bed. As one who tends to freeze in the winter time and must go to bed dressed in layers and covered with a sheet, blanket and comforter, wrapping up in these sheets was heavenly! It is like wearing new soft footy pajamas. Wanna sleep naked in January when it is below zero? Go right ahead! Just have these fleece sheets on your bed.

Oh, and by the way, they are very, very reasonably priced.

Get thee to a Costco and splurge on a set of Life Comfort fleece. You will be glad you did!
Happy New Year from the Mumblerrrs!!

poopy-doopy-doo

Poop, poop, and more poop. I honestly don't think I have ever dealt with so much poop in my life. Toddler poop, preschooler poop, kitty poop. Today I even sang a song about poop -- totally made up and silly but fun to sing. Just don't ask me to repeat it because I don't remember it.

While S is very well potty-trained, she still needs some "help" finishing up. E, of course, is still in diapers. (However, he is already requesting to sit on the potty! How cool is that?) I don't even want to talk about Willoughby right now. (He managed to get out of the basement while we were gone during Christmas, but he couldn't get himself back in. Guess where his litter box was.)

To top it all off, we took the kids for complete physicals and testing at the international adoption clinic through Columbus Children's Hospital, and so we are now having to collect stool samples -- poop in a tube. Oh, the joy of scraping toxic waste from a diaper or out of a potty! We even have a special trashcan in the garage just for the disposal of all the poopiness in its various forms.

I guess it sounds like we are having an extraordinary amount of poo around here, but it is really just the result of going from one child who no longer needs help in such ways to now having 2 children who do -- plus a cat with issues.

Well, that the poop, I mean, scoop from here. Time for bed. Mumblerrr out.

random mumbles

Random thoughts:

**I think I am officially a soccer mom. We have a son who plays soccer, and we now own a minivan. Is that all you need?? Somebody let me know if there are more requirements.

**Nobody come to our house for awhile. Please. This week I have been experiencing life as a single mom to three as M works insane hours at Sugardaddy's. By insane, I mean that he leaves home around 3 p.m., gets home around 11 a.m. (yes, as in the next day), sleeps for a few hours, and then leaves again. While I seem to be doing ok kid-wise, my housekeeping is suffering a bit. I am one who cannot stand clutter, so there are parts of my house (like the kitchen island, the kitchen table, our bedroom) that are testing my ability to let things go. Oh, and do NOT go into J's room! Just don't. It should all get better soon, I hope. M comes home today.

**I saw a guy running yesterday, and I was jealous. I'm not a runner, but I am used to getting some heart-pumping exercise. Sure, lately I have been doing a lot of lifting, stair climbing, and carrying. A lot of great upper-body work. But, man, to spend an hour on an elliptical sounds FABULOUS right now!

**The kids are still good in stores. How long will that last? They were more animated yesterday, but still very well behaved. I just have to smile at all the moms yelling at their kids, and the kids who are having major meltdowns. Hmm. . . how soon until that is me? How soon until the kids have to stay home with dad when mom goes shopping??

**Our house is really loud these days. Like right now. It's such great fun to drop metal coasters on the table. Give it a try sometime!

get me some velcro

Bonding and attaching. Many people think that these are the same thing, but they're not. Attachment is a much stronger form of a bond. Think of it this way: You and your favorite co-worker bond over a pizza and beer when you go out. You complain about work, gossip about other co-workers, etc. But would you tell that co-worker a deep dark secret? Would you confide in him/her your fears? Is this the person you call when you need someone? Probably not. Think of your mother. Your sister. Your best friend. Think of the person you trust with your life. That is attachment.

Adopted children may have different levels of attachment with their new parents. Some parents claim that attachment happened quickly and they have no issues in that regard. Others, however, need to seek professional help in order for attachment to happen. No matter what, it is something that adoptive parents have to work on from the beginning to ensure its success. Those who ignore signs of problems will end up facing much bigger issues later, and they will be harder to fix.

Part of the whole process is making sure that all of the caregiving is done by the parents. The child needs to learn that these new people will take care of him/her and they can be trusted to always be there. If not, they will go to anyone for anything, and that is a bad, bad thing. Unfortunately, those who are not in the know look at that behavior and say, "Oh look, she likes me! She's letting me hold her and carry her and feed her! What a good girl!"

Ugh! No! No! No! You see, the problem is that while it might seem so sweet and nice that the child will let Grandma, Aunt Sally, and mom's best friend do this, the child will probably also let the neighbor down the street, the stranger they have never met, or maybe even the psycho child predator that no one knows about.

So, it is super-duper important that these kiddos learn to identify with the parents as their sole caregivers for the first several weeks that they are home. They have to form that attachment of trust and understanding before they start going to others for diaper changes and feedings.
In a similar vein, it is important for adopted kids to cry. You see, many have been in an orphanage setting where their needs were not met when they cried, so they just stopped. Since crying is how little ones communicate, not crying is not good.

So, for all you out there who might have newly adopted children in your lives but aren't their parents, don't be offended if you can't care for the kids right away. Mom and Dad aren't being mean or selfish or over-protective. There are lots of ways to help out: Make a meal, clean something, do a load of laundry, shop for groceries, help organize all their stuff -- because they have a LOT of stuff. But when the little one needs a diaper change or the toddler needs the potty, take them to mom or dad. When they need to be fed, go ahead and find the food, but have mom or dad give it to them. Also, don't take the child out of the parent's sight until the parent indicates that it is ok.

For some it will happen quickly, but for others it will take longer. Right now, our little one will scream his head off, I'm sure, if someone other than mom or dad were to change his diaper. (Hey, he screamed at us the first few times, too!) But our 3 yo is different. She is an outgoing little girl who loves attention, and she is showing us she is willing to go to others. It is something we have to be careful with for awhile. It can be hard when you are cute and giggly and everybody loves you -- makes bonding easy, though.

I know that many of you reading this probably know all this stuff, but maybe some of you don't, so that's why I'm putting it out there. Adoption is complex and requires a lot of education and work. Thanks to all of you who help just by being there and understanding.
:)

life in the slow lane

I'm working on a post with some additional thoughts about our trip, but it is taking some work so I've decided to move on for now. I'll post that one later. Instead, how about a bit of everyday life?

So how are things going?
What's life like now with 3 kids?
How's everybody sleeping?
Where is everybody sleeping?
How is J doing?

These are some of our typical questions. People seemed to be almost fascinated by what we've done. Adopting from Ethiopia. Adopting 2 kids from Ethiopia. Adopting a toddler and a preschooler. Going from 1 kid to 3. Maybe because we have been dealing with this mentally and emotionally for several months and now in reality for about a month, it just doesn't seem out of the realm of normalcy. Being a blog stalker, I know of many families who are in situations much, um, "stranger" than ours. They have many more kids, they adopt 3 at a time, the kids are school-agers, or maybe the child has a life-threatening illness. Sometimes single women (gasp!) turn their lives upside-down by adopting a child or two. So, I guess just as people are curious about our new family, I tend to be curious by their reactions.

Overall, things are going very well. One of my friends (yes, you Jen K.!) asked me a great question. She wanted to know if things were easier, harder or about what I expected. I was pleased to say that things were about what I expected. Of course, that was during the first week when M was home in the evenings. (It is crazy holiday time at Sugardaddy's.) For the last two weeks and for next week, he has been working the graveyard shift -- goes in at 3 in the afternoon and doesn't get home until 3 in the morning. That leaves me home alone with the kids in the afternoon and evening. Talk about trial by fire.

My biggest challenge has been J. It's like he has 2 new interactive toys that he hasn't quite figured out. E has a piercing scream and S has an annoying squealy whine. J manages to bring out these two wonderful qualities on a regular basis. He is getting better, but he has some work to do. My big question to him is, "How many times do you have to hear that noise before you stop what you are doing??" He has always seemed to think that when told to stop that it means to do it 5 more times.

My other challenge is that the two little ones tend to compete to be held. E has become a big mama's boy after treating me like a redheaded alien with two heads during that week in Ethiopia. S, after having my attention to herself for the most part, now has to share with little brother. As with J, the situation is getting better, but it has its moments. Things are usually much easier when dad is home to help divide and conquer -- unless they are both rejecting dad in favor of the mama. Fortunately, dad is quite charming and soon wins one or both over and my load lightens.

As for not going insane, here's what I decided: It is important to let things go. Is my house as orderly as I would like it to be? Nope, but it's not too bad. I've seen worse. Is the laundry piling up. Yep, but everyone still has clean clothes everyday. Have we put up a Christmas tree yet? Nah. That should happen this weekend. Am I able to project the image of perfection that every American woman/mother is supposed to have? Absolutely not. Don't think I ever did. What I am trying to do is live life at a slower pace than most in America. Transitions, attachment, routines all take time. We've been home for 3 weeks. So, no, we have not gone out and engaged in all kinds of cultural activities or signed them up for Amharic or English lessons. I did not send out Christmas cards with a pic of our beautiful new very multicultural family. Sorry. I have other priorities at the moment. Like spending time giggling with a little boy who has decided I can be his mama, or snuggling with a big boy while watching his favorite movie, or doing a little girl's hair so that it looks like I have a small clue about African hair. I have found that if I concentrate on these important things and let other things go -- no matter what those out there in our hurry-up, judgmental society think -- that I'm doing ok. It will be interesting to see how life evolves.

Well, I have a stinky boy who needs a diaper change. Just another one of those priorities. A smelly one, but one that "ranks" right up there often above all else.
:)

random ethiopia stuff

I thought before I leave the subject of traveling in Ethiopia that it might be a good idea to do one more post that includes some observations, stories, and maybe some tips. I know that some of you who read this are planning travel and might find some of it useful. If you've already been, please feel free to add any other thoughts in the comments section as I know that I won't remember everything I want to say. I think having a brain that currently borders on resembling swiss cheese at times gives me a pretty good excuse for my lack of memory. Having to referree (or maybe play zone defense?) three kids in the early a.m. also causes some issues.

These various thoughts are based on staying at the House of Hope, so some things will be a bit different for those at a hotel.

Let's see. . .

1. Yes, it is a warm country, but still plan to take pants and long sleeves. It does get cool in the morning and evening, but the afternoons get toasty. I never thought I would feel immodest in a pair of khakis and a short-sleeved shirt, but seeing everyone else with long sleeves made me feel a bit that way. When we were out and I saw a woman dressed more "western" (I actually saw one in a halter) I was taken aback. Funny how local sensibilities take hold in such a short time.

2. Not much dairy in Addis. I had some in my coffee once, but that was it.

3. We didn't have dessert after meals. If chocolate is one of your required food groups, take it with you.

4. Don't plan to do the driving yourself. CHI will get a driver for you and you will be eternally grateful. If you are not with CHI, I imagine your agency will do the same. If not, get one!

5. I had great hair in Addis. Really! I think it was the lack of humidity that gave me straighter more manageable hair, but maybe the ickies in the water helped out. Who knows?

6. Be prepared to see just about anything because you just might.

7. If you go to any of the museums, you will probably be searched. They may go through your bag and give you a "pat down" on the way in and on the way out.


8. Make sure your money is 2001 or newer. We did see someone's bill get rejected when getting our visas. Take more 50s and 100s than 20s.

9. Speaking of money, I had read that there would be an "exit fee" when we left, but we were never charged that.

10. When paying a driver or someone for an extra service (like a trip outside the city), make sure it is very clear from the beginning what the charge will be. Let's just say we had a little issue with that.

11. Get out of the city if you can. It is such a beautiful country; make sure to see some of it.

12. Don't forget to bring home some unroasted coffee! Just remember to declare it to customs.

leavin' on a jet plane (everybody sing!)

Wow. Where do the days go? Suddenly it is Sunday and I haven't written anything since Tuesday. Oh, yeah. I have 3 kids now. So, do you want to know about our last day in Ethiopia? A day that almost wasn't our last day? Ok, here ya go:

Friday, November 23, 2007:

We woke up on Friday with a sense of purpose and energy. We were leaving that evening to bring our kids home (home!!) and we had a busy agenda for the day. In addition to finishing some last minute packing, we needed to pass out some gifts for the House of Hope staff, do some shopping, take some pics, and finally say our goodbyes. We also needed the kids' visas from the embassy, but Tsegay was taking care of that for us.

We headed out with Abel and our translator friend to do some shopping. First stop was the bank to exchange some dollars for birr. Now, I have to admit that numbers have never been my thing, and even though I get that $100 was about 900 birr, I still had a hard time figuring out conversions. I just left it to M. Abel took us to a nice row of shops, and he carried our bags from place to place. I think we made some great purchases, but I now wish we had gotten more. Regrets, regrets.

One of the funny things about being some place like Addis is that white people really stick out. I found myself thinking, "Oh, look, another white person!" Like we were novelties or something. While we were shopping, we happened upon a white dad and his white son. Naturally, we struck up a conversation and found out they were also there adopting and were also leaving that evening. It was just kind of weird. Another time we were driving through town and I saw this young blonde woman dash from a store to a car, and I thought, "Wow, she looks out of place." Then I realized that that sentiment probably applies to me, too. (I'm not as young or as blonde, though.)

Before heading back to HoH, we stopped to buy some coffee. Not a Starbucks grande, no-fat, double-shot somethingorother, but unroasted Ethiopian coffee beans. Four pounds worth. Three kids and four bags of coffee coming home with us makes for a nice Ethiopian trip.

Got back to HoH and headed for lunch. I met with Tsegay in the dining room and he brought our sealed envelopes (don't open!!) and the visas for the kids. He also brought a story.

Apparently, the American Embassy in Addis Ababa experienced a bomb threat that morning. No biggie, right? Usually, not a biggie. Today, it was a biggie. You see, the embassy truly believes in TGIF and practices it by only working a half a day on Fridays. Tsegay was standing outside the embassy waiting for the all clear and the hours kept passing him by. Finally, at 11:30 he was able to enter the embassy and found a clerk who was willing to help him. He walked out at 11:45 -- 15 minutes before the embassy would close for the day. Otherwise, we would have been there until at least Monday. Can I just say that it is one of those things I am glad I didn't know about until it was over?

We rounded out the afternoon with some gift-giving, picture-taking, and an early dinner. Finally, it was time to head to the airport. Not easy. Ephrim, our driver, was wonderful and helped us load up and get the kids in the car. He couldn't, however, keep everyone from crying. Because our kids had been there since July, I think it was extra hard on everyone to see them go. For their part, the kids seemed to do ok. Very quiet, but ok.

I again won't bore you with travel details, but I will say that the flight went well. The kids did a great job -- except for S and the seatbelt, but a nice Ethiopian family helped us with that. Somehow, we made it to D.C., made it through immigration, made it through customs, got our bags, got to our gate, ate some food, and hung out until our plane arrived. Ok, so S had a meltdown during that part of the wait, but who could blame her? Here's a good pic of a calmer time:

Before long, we were back in Columbus and heading home.

Wow.

We did it.

Now we just have to keep it going.

:)

Next up: A new life with 3 kids.

the day of all days

Sorry it has taken me awhile to get back to our adventure. It has been a busy week.
It is now time to write about the day of all days. While I am going to be very honest about this day, I am also going to keep certain details private. Here we go. . .

Thursday, November 22, 2007:

On Wednesday evening, we were told of a change in our plans. Instead of Ephrim driving us, we would have someone else plus a translator. Also, we would leave at 6 a.m. sharp. (Now, would this be the American 6 a.m. sharp or the Ethiopian version?) After a full day on Wednesday and difficulty with the kids at bedime, I will admit that my heart wasn't into this trip. We would be leaving very early for a 3+ hour journey with two small children and riding with people we didn't know. At that moment, I truly didn't want to go. It was building up as a possible nightmarish event. But what could we do? This was a once-in-a-lifetime trip and the birthmother would be waiting. No choice. I was up at 4:30 to get myself ready just in case we were really leaving at 6 a.m.

We didn't. It was closer to 6:30, but for Ethiopian time that was pretty good. We climbed into a minibus with our kids, Tsegay's wife, Almaz, the driver and the driver's friend. Before we left Addis, we needed to pick up the translator, who happened to be a friend of Almaz. Then, we headed out of town.

The Ethiopian countryside is beautiful. M and I kept saying, "We only see this on tv or magazines!" Granted, the poverty is still evident, especially in the small towns and villages that we would roll through. Occasionally we would notice a wrecked, burned out minibus on the side of the road --kind of like the one we were in. M and I made up stories to ease our minds about how everyone survived, no injuries. We also had to slow down for the occasional cattle crossing.





It was during this trip that E finally paid some attention to me -- actual eye contact!! Not only that, he SMILED at me! Oh such progress. S, of the other hand, was busy being carsick.

We finally made it to our destination town and stopped at a local hotel for breakfast. I had some toast with tea and worried about the water in the tea -- bottled water didn't seem to be offered as this wasn't a very touristy area. Oh, how I was hoping that all the ickies had been boiled away! Being a bit nervous about the whole day, I only managed one piece of toast (wonderful bread!) and a few sips of tea hoping that Montezuma (sp?) wouldn't find me in Ethiopia. Then, we were finally on our way to the orphanage.


When we arrived, we were directed to the inside of the main room of the orphanage where there were people there to greet us. As I was greeting a woman in the traditional way, I was told she was the mother. Oh my goodness! I wasn't ready! And standing behind her ready to be greeted was the grandmother! Double oh my goodness! Talk about an awkward moment. We sat down for a few minutes before taking a tour of the orphanage. We went into the room where the children slept and saw the beds that were once used by S and E. Other beds were occupied by little infants, including one that was only a month old. I instantly thought of our newest niece, Abigail, and how she had come into this world so differently. I wanted to grab up this littlest one, hold her close, take her home, and put her in a safe, proper crib. She was so tiny! Another baby being tended to was giving us sweet smiles, and another was busy kicking covers off and giving us a peek at his little tushy. Oops!

We then went to tour the other building and see the pretty flower garden. It really was a nice spot. Sometime during all of this seeing and greeting, we had a coffee ceremony and a few minutes with the mother and grandmother. They were happy to consent to some pictures, and we learned some information that was actually different than what we had originally been told. The one thing I wish I had done was to go with a few prepared questions to have the translator ask their mother. I had imagined conversation just naturally happening between us, but in reality the meeting felt too awkward for that to happen. For our part, we worried about what they were thinking of us, these Americans coming to take their children. I'm guessing they had similar but opposite worries -- what must these Americans think of us giving up our children? As a result, we often had uncomfortable silence. The automatic bond I had hoped for didn't materialize.

Before long, we were told it was time to go. We all gathered outside for goodbyes. As I once again went to the mother, I wanted to put my arms around her and hug her tight, but I wasn't sure how that would be received. I held back and settled for the traditional. As I walked away, my throat closed up and the tears came. I had worked so hard on this trip not to cry because I was afraid that if I started that I would not be able to stop. True enough, but it couldn't be helped.

I then felt a little foolish for my emotions as the family climbed into the minibus with us -- we were giving them a ride back to their town. The awkwardness continued for several miles until we finally reached their drop-off point. We pulled off to the side of the road to let them out and to wait for other people we were driving to Addis. As we waited, neighbors and family members came to say goodbye to the kids and wave to us. Woweeewowow, really uncomfortable as all we could do was sit there and wait. I waited for major breakdowns (from either the adults or the children) but it didn't happen. After many minutes, the door was closed and we started to pull away. I continued to wave and looked for their mother. She found me and gave me a big wave and a smile. In that last instant, I felt the connection I had hoped for. A moment now burned into my heart.

With a sigh of relief we started our long journey back to Addis. That sigh of relief didn't last long: it was now very hot and we were holding two very warm children. S slept for most of the trip on my lap as I wiped the sweat off her face. The driver blasted the same tunes over and over -- the speaker was back by us, so he had to turn it up to hear. Traffic was heavier, so the trip was slower going back than coming. Somehow, we made it back to the House of Hope in good shape -- just sweaty and a bit weary. There was food waiting for us, and we here happy for it. The best part of the evening? E decided he wanted me, the mama. For some unknown reason, I became his one and only -- not the security guy, not the driver, not dad. Me, me, me! I ate it up!!

Good thing I did. By the next morning he was done with me. Back to dad.
Only one more day in Addis. A little shopping, some packing, and visas to get the kids out of Africa and into America. What could possibly go wrong? Or almost wrong. . .

need me some pepto

Tuesday, November 20, 2007:

Let's call this our down day. Since I was feeling a tad crummy in the tummy, we chose not to go on an extended city tour. (Oh, just the thought of getting in the car gave me the oogies.) Instead, it was paperwork day. With our embassy appointment on Wednesday, we needed to make sure we had everything in order. So, that morning I sat down with Tsegay and went through it all. I loved it every time he said, "No, you don't need that one."

We'll move on to a more exciting day.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007:

Embassy Day!! But not until 3:30 in the afternoon, so we went on a couple of adventures with another CHI family. First stop was the National Museum -- the place Lucy is normally kept when she isn't touring the United States. Go figure. Quite an interesting place. It was nice to have both Ephraim and our other driver, Abel, along to help explain some of the displays. I think they were proud to present their country and culture to us.

Our second stop was the Ethiopian Orthodox Museum. We were waiting outside when we saw some important looking people standing about. One was in white robes and hat and seemed to be the center of attention. Someone said, "I wonder if he's someone important." M commented, "Well, considering his picture is on that billboard behind him, I would say, yes, he must be important." He was the Orthodox patriarch -- their Pope.

After a bit of a wait, we made it into the museum gallery. Normally, it is at least a 2 hour tour, but we only had an hour to spare. Our tour guide chose to cram the whole thing into an hour by talking reaaaallly reaaallly fast instead of just giving the highlights. It was fascinating information, but you had to fully concentrate to follow along. Not easy to do when you aren't feeling the greatest and you have little children to attend to. Definitely something to take in, but more time is highly recommended.

After we made our way back to House of Hope, we quickly changed and prepared for our journey to the Embassy. I sat up front this time, and that actually seemed to help a bit. I think it was because I spent a lot of the drive turned toward the back talking to Tsegay. It took my attention away from what was going on outside my window. Anyway, we arrived at the Embassy, made our way through two security points -- sampling the water in the sippy cup to prove we weren't carrying liquid explosives, and found the room we needed to be in. Picture a smaller, nicer version of a BMV. After a short wait, we were called up to the window. Sign here, sign there, answer this question, that question, raise your right hand and say I do. Easy as cake, piece of pie. She gave us copies of documents and we were on our way. Actually, we were on our way to a small courtyard area while we waited for the other family to finish.

As we made our way back outside and crossed the street, a crowd of school children were walking home. I felt like a celebrity. The kids looked and whispered to each other, giving us smiles. When I was standing by the car, holding S and waiting to get in, kids came up to shake my hand. It was so sweet and a little funny. I think that was my five minutes of fame for my lifetime.

We made it back to House of Hope for dinner and settled in for bed. It wasn't an easy task since S had a long moment of grief and sobbed herself to sleep. Reality was setting in, I think, and there was little I could do but hold her while she cried. Our little 3-year-old was experiencing quite a bit, and there is only so much emotion that can be kept in.

The next day we were scheduled to travel to the kids' first orphanage -- a good 3 hours away -- and meet their birthmom. I was more than a little nervous, especially since the kids were coming with us.

How did it go? I'm not sure my words will do it justice, but I will give it a shot. Later. Stay tuned.

:)

beep beep

Well, 2 out of 3 kids are currently sleeping, so it seems like a good time to blog. (It would also be a good time to sleep!)

Picking up where I left off before. . .

We finished up our afternoon of injera-ing and coffee-ing and went on a quick tour of the city with Ephraim, our driver. Ephraim was fabulous and the kids absolutely love him. We had to stop and get gas (I noticed that they didn't post the prices like we do here, so I have no idea how much it cost) and we noticed that the men at the gas station seemed to be talking about us and chuckling a bit. All kinds of possibilities went through my head, but I was pretty off base. As we pulled out of the station, Ephraim explained that they when they found out who we were and why we were there, they were joking that we could take them with us too. Kind of like, hey, do they want more? They can adopt us to America, too! It made me smile.

My smiling ended as our drive continued. Driving in Addis Ababa is nothing like driving in the U.S. Don't have a lane to drive in? No problem! Just make one. Going through an intersection with no traffic light? No problem! Just look both ways and try to get through without getting hit. Pedestrian? Oh, just honk your horn. You know that feeling you get when you are almost in an accident? Imagine feeling it constantly (from the backseat while holding a child) and you have an idea of driving in Addis. It was hard to know what to focus on: the chaotic traffic seemingly endangering your life or the random sighting of pack mules and other livestock that may be walking the city streets. How about the woman getting off the bus with a dead chicken clutched in her hand? Or the bare-butt little boy standing on the sidewalk? It was so much to take in. Ephraim did a wonderful job of showing us the highlights, and he is obviously very proud of his city. However, I had to fess up and admit that I was getting car sick. I never get car sick, but my gills were turning green and had to request our return to HoH. I think other things contributed, like jet lag, the air quality, the stress and excitement of the day, but I knew that driving in Addis was something that would take some getting used to.

so happy together. well, for most of us.

Before I begin the telling of today's episode, I want to share a bit of our first adventure here at home. We've basically been holed up at home, adjusting and getting comfortable. I decided that we were finally ready to venture out today for a short excursion -- a trip to Target and a drive thru the bank. Woo hoo! I think the cold wind was a bit of a surprise to them, but they thought riding in the cart at Target was such a thrill! Once that excitement passed, they just stared at everything like it was a different world. Go figure. Then, when we left, I thought it almost funny that the song on the radio was that "Feed the World" Christmas song -- seemed strange to hear that and have 2 Ethiopian children in my backseat. I guess it would have been even more appropriate if J had been in the car, too.

(Oh, and before I forget, yes, Christy K, we did have an Ermias sighting. What a cutie!)

So, on to the scoop. . .

Monday, November 19, 2007:

After a restless night, we get up and get ready for the day. Not really knowing what we were supposed to do, we left our room to head down to the main dining area. As we walk outside toward the steps, we can see directly into a classroom where a little girl is sitting on a chair. Our little girl. She stares at us and starts walking out the door to us with her little brother following. She seems shy and unsure but still willing to meet us. Little brother starts by giving us a cute smile only to change his mind about that. His reservation kicks in as hers fades away. Just then, Tsegay comes up and takes us all back to our living quarters so that we can have a chance to get to know our kids. For S, this is great! We knew that she had been waiting for us -- even wanting to stay up all night. E, on the other hand, really wanted nothing to do with us. Balloons helped a bit, but he preferred to keep his distance. In a short amount of time we became accustomed to his high pitched expression of discontent and his serious look of disinterest. Stay away from me. I know who you are and I know why you are here, and I'm having none of it. S, on the other hand, couldn't have been happier or more excited if we had come with an extensive wardrobe from Macy's. (She looooves trying on clothes.)

Eventually, we were left alone with our two new kiddos. E warmed up to M but balked at having his diaper changed. Ok, he more than balked; he flat out refused. My attempt was not met with any more acceptance, but he was ready for a nap and was willing to let me hold him for that. (Note this because it will be days before he lets me hold him again.)

In the afternoon, we are treated to a traditional Ethiopian meal and coffee ceremony. It was so much food! Fortunately, our 3 y.o. is well-versed in how to correctly eat Ethiopian food. It was amazing to watch her. I was a little worried when we moved on to the coffee because I'm not much of a coffee drinker -- put lots of chocolate in it and I might be fine. They roasted the coffee beans right in our room and served the coffee in these pretty little cups that might be a quarter of the size of the typical American coffee cup. Maybe. I couldn't finish the first cup. It was delicious but strong, and I knew if I finished my cup that they would give me a second. So, I let M handle the coffee drinking duties for us.

I'll finish out the day later. I have two little stinkers running around.
:)

arriving in addis

Day 2: November 18, 2007

Like the cattle that commonly cross the country roads of Ethiopia, the passengers of flight 501 headed off the plane and into the line for visas. With a simple form and 20 bucks each, we obtained temporary visas and were allowed to enter the country. We quickly changed $100 to birr, found our luggage and headed out to the waiting crowd. Since you are only allowed into the airport if you are traveling, the House of Hope director (Tsegay) and the driver were waiting for us outside the doors of the airport. After a traditional 3-kiss greeting, we headed to the mini-bus that would take us to the transition home. It was dark out, so there wasn't much to see on the 20-25 minute trip. What we did see threw us into instant culture shock: child beggars, people walking in the streets, cars seemingly driving in a haphazard way, whole carcasses hanging in small street-side meat shops, a bumpy dirt road taking us to our children. What would we see in the daylight?

When we arrived at the House of Hope, the children were already asleep. Still, Tsegay and his wife took us to see our new son and daughter and also to see all of the other kiddos. They were all so beautiful!! One baby girl, Jill's daughter, woke up and gave us a smile. Oh, how she made my heart melt! It was hard to go back to our room and turn in for the night, and we didn't find sleeping any easier. Not only were our internal clocks all screwed up, but we also knew we would be meeting our children the next day. Who could sleep??

So now we come to today's cliffhanger. Will the first meeting be a fairy tale? Drama? Nightmare? Will we accidently drink the water? You will have to check back for the next installment -- whenever that may be.
:)

home again home again

Hi all!

Weee'rrre baaaaack!! I'm sitting here with S on my lap at 6:47 a.m. so not sure how long this post will last. I will try to eventually get our whole adventure posted, but I think it will take several attempts and several days to do it.

I'll start with the day we left. (The beginning is always a good place to start, dontcha think?)

Day 1: Saturday, November 17th.

We left Columbus at 2:30 in the afternoon and arrived in Addis Ababa on Sunday around 7:30 pm. Only issue: having to wait until we got to D.C. to find out the outcome of the OSU/Michigan game. Let's just say that it was a good start to a good trip. I won't bore you with any other travel details. Not much to tell here.

For those of you with upcoming travel: We flew Ethiopian and were pleased. It was a comfortable flight despite flying economy both ways. I know Lufthansa is nicer, but we didn't feel like paying the extra $1300 for whatever was nicer or making a stop in Sudan. But that's just us.

Tune in later for more tales and adventures coming to a computer near you . . . as long as a computer is near me.

:)

We're here!

The kids are WONDERFUL. Our daughter M is a total ham and keeps jibber jabbering to us in Amharic. So cute but we don't understand a word she is saying (except that she does say the name of her big brother!). Our son E is having a tough time with the adjustment but I think we are making progress. Hopefully by Friday he will be more accepting. It will also be easier when we are his only caregivers.

Ethiopia is a totally different world. Went on a tour of the city today and I am amazed we were not in an accident or didn't run someone over. I was feeling a bit ill by the time we made it back. Not looking forward to more driving here.

Communication is sketchy. I don't think we will be able to call/email as often as I would like, but we'll do our best to keep you posted.

hang on sloopy, sloopy hang on. . .one more day

Yes, I have a list of things to do, but I still wanted to put another post out there. Hey, I'm multitasking as we speak: blogging, eating and doing laudry!

So, anyone out there ever have a minor freak out moment in a bank?? Please don't let me be the only one who has had to do breathing exercises while standing at the counter. You see, I called our bank a couple of weeks ago to order nice, newer clean bills for our trip. Ethiopia isn't quite on the plastic system like we are here in the states, and they require that our money is 2001 or newer. Oh, and it's best to take 50s and 100s because the exchange rate is better and you have fewer bills to carry. So, no problem -- bank said they would order it for me and told me when to go and pick it up. I went yesterday (2 days before traveling, mind you) and found our bank in the middle of a "temporary emergency." Whaaa???? So, I went back later when the "temporary emergency" was apparently over and found the woman that I had spoken with on the phone. I then learned that they hadn't ordered me any 50s or 100s -- only 20s. So, while I stood there trying not to hyperventilate, she and another worker went digging in the money to find me the bills that I needed. All seemed well when I left the bank money in hand. All was not so well when I looked the bills over when I got home -- 1999, 1996, etc. Oh. No. Panic attack starts to return. Hubby comes home and takes over. He calls a different bank, tells them the situation, leaves, returns, we have new money. bing bang boom. Crises over.
(Do you ever feel sometimes like someone somewhere is just playing with ya?)

Good news: B&N came through for us! We have the 2 books we ordered, so I now have something to read on the plane. Hallelujah!!

Special thanks going out to our friend, Mary. (I know she is just thrilled that we are naming her here. Yeah, not so much, right, Mary?) She is not only transporting us and all of our luggage to the airport tomorrow, but she is going to be in charge of J until Jen can get up here from Cincy. Then, to top it all off, she's organizing some meals for us when we return home. This is vital to our survival as Mark will be returning to work and I can't cook. And also thanks to Jill for reminding me that I should ask for help with food. Hey, I could live on cereal, but the kids need more than that.

Well, I better get busy. Lots to do before J comes home -- tonight is family dinner/movie/snuggle night. A very important one.

Oh, and one more thought: GO BUCKEYES!! O-H!! I-O!! (yes, I will still wear my scarlet and gray tomorrow.)
:)
ciao for now.

T minus, um, not much

Good thing my to-do list is getting shorter because we are running out of time!!
Let's see, this is Thursday, right??

Here's the update:

* So far, all is well. We are packed, the important paperwork is ready, and nerves seem to be in check.

* One screw up: We ordered the Lonely Planet Amharic Phrasebook online from B&N, as well as a book for me to read on the plane. Supposed to ship within 24 hours. Nope. They've had some sort of glitch and won't get it here until after we leave. I keep picturing someone in a warehouse trying to remember where they put the Amharic phrasebooks. As one who used to work for a book wholesaler and had the pleasure of spending days in a large warehouse full of books (pure heaven for me) I can totally see Amharic phrasebooks being misplaced. I want to call them and say, "Go check where you shelved the Lonely Planet Arabic books." Oy. What's worse is that my friend Jen got me started on a new book series, and I'm dying for book 2! (It's the Stephanie Meyer "Twilight" books -- young adult, vampires, surprisingly captivating.)

* House is a mess. Gotta clean it today. Driving me nuts.

* J has been practicing his good-byes. He comes up to me, gives a big hug, and says, "Bye-Bye, Mommy." He tries to sound all sad and pathetic -- he's pretty good at that. More than once I have caught him cracking a smile, so I know he's just trying to get to me. Smart kid.

* Speaking of J, I have to do a bit of bragging and a bit of embarrassing. On Tuesday, they had this thing at his school called a Town Meeting. Basically a group of about 13 second graders were chosen to get up in front of other 2nd graders and parents to read something that they had written. J was chosen for this. So, I went to his school and crammed into the library with the rest of the proud parents, and two of the 2nd grade classes came and sat on the floor to listen to the presentations. There is nothing like being in the presence of a bunch of 8-year-olds to remind you how normal (and great!) your own kid is. Oh my. Some of the kids seemed to a tad spaced out on their meds, other kids appeared to need some meds, and then most of them were fairly well-behaved 2nd graders. J did an awesome job of waiting his turn and then getting up in front of the crowd and reading about his Favorite Fall Day into the microphone. I was very proud of him. (One kid got up there, said his name, and then ran off.) Whenever I wonder if my son is too crazy, wild, ill-mannered, etc., it helps to hang out with his peers. Makes him look like the model of maturity -- and if you know J, that really says something about the other kids!

Now for the embarrassing part:
J is a snuggler. Don't know when he will give this up, but for now it is a must for him. He LOVES LOVES LOVES to snuggle up with mom and dad. So, he's telling me the necessary steps for snuggling. Step 1: First, you find a tender woman. (WHAT?! How old are you? 30?)
Step 2: Then, you fart in her ear. (Oh yeah, you're an 8-year-old boy. How could I forget.)
His favorite word of the moment has been tender. Mommy are you tender? Mom, you're tender. Mom, what does tender mean?

* We'll attempt to blog and email while we are away. I apologize in advance if it doesn't happen as often as I would like. We'll see what happens. And to all of you who have children in the House of Hope, we will be sure to give them lots of hugs and kisses for you.

That's all for now. I'll try to post at least one more time before we head out on Saturday. Everybody enjoy The Game for us!
:)

the countdown is on. . .

Only 5 days to go. Here are the highlights:

1. Pink coat! As noted previously, our daughter has a particular pink coat that she is wearing in just about every picture we have of her. We've been a little worried about whether she might be attached to this coat and dealing with the probability of having to leave it behind. Well, thanks to my super-most-wonderful-est friend, Suzanne, it is less of a worry now. Upon seeing the pics and hearing that we have yet to get a new pink coat, Suzanne leaped into action and recently informed me that a pink coat is on the way! How cool is that? Thanks, Suzanne!

2. Packing is a pain. I'm usually pretty good at packing myself, M, and J, but this has been a whole new experience for me. My stuff has been easy. It's been all the things for 2 kids (whom I have yet to meet) who need things for a week in a warmish third world country before arriving in the U.S. midwest in late November. We also have to include small gifts for the workers in the transition home. (What do you possibly give to people who have been caring for your children for the past several months???) Of course, there are also the small backpacks and diaper bag for the trip home -- not to mention all the diapers! I somehow managed to get the donations into one large bag instead of two smaller ones. Fortunately, I am almost done with it all. Can't say it's pretty, but at this point I don't really care.

3. I have almost wrapped up my classwork. Have a few more papers to read and some copies to make, but I should be ready to turn it all over to the sub. Hallelujah.

4. Plans seem to be in place for the care of J and Willoughby kitty.

5. Made the realization this weekend that this is my last week left of being a mom to just J. What an odd mixture of emotions that created. Mainly just weird to think about. After all, he has been it for the past 7+ years now.

6. We're leaving in 5 days!! AAAAAGGGGHHHHH!

can't wait!
:)

In the words of the prophet...

In the words of the prophet, Dave Matthews, "Open up my head and let me out..."

So we're 8 days from travel, and our carefree lifestyle isn't changing much. Lots of little projects to accomplish (cat flap on the basement door so the kiddos don't experiment with gravity there), packing still to be done, and lists to be made. Okay, so I generally leave it to C to make the lists. It's always been my way to keep the to-do list in the place where I have the most room -- my big, mostly empty head. But lately the empty spaces seem to be filling up.

Let's face it, we're about to undergo a radical, life-changing transition, and we find ourselves as worried about helping others cope with that change as with dealing with it in our own hearts. Friends and family are counting down with us, and trying to gauge our emotional barometers as t(ravel)-day approaches. My bosses are clearly a lot more concerned about whether brownie baking will go as well without me for a short week than what two new children in a new house with a new family will do to my lifestyle short- and long-term (as wonderful as they've been to me over the years, they haven't asked me once about how any of this actually feels). We're panicked about our new daughter's ever-present pink coat (she's wearing it in all the pictures) and whether she'll have to leave it behind. J wondered aloud last night about whether we'll pay attention to him any more once the newbies come home. And it seems like suddenly all our alma maters (we have 5 between us) are calling and asking if we can spare some cash for capital campaigns. Maybe when we come back will send them some birr. Think they'd give us a good conversion rate?

Makes you wish the idea of the pensieve from Harry Potter was real, in a way.

But like C said a few weeks ago -- maybe an 18-hour flight is just what we need. Anyone have reading suggestions? I have a library card and a gift certificate for Barnes and Noble, and maybe I'll get a spare few minutes in the next week (between cat flaps, storm doors, brownies, laundry, packing, inventory, training, recipe development, shopping, list-making, and holding J very close as often as possible) to look for literature.

So in the words of the prophet: "Open up my head and let me out...BABY!!"

was it something i ate?

Last year, on the eve of the Ohio State-Michigan game, I woke up in the middle of the night barfing my brains out. And I couldn't stop. Even when nothing was left in me, for some unknown reason, my body felt the need to continue purging. I have never felt that sick before in my life. We ended up taking the most torturous trip to Urgent Care -- a little tip: never drive bumpy, curvy backroads when your passenger is feeling pukey. We left Urgent Care with a prescription for some magic pills: anti-nausea meds. Ok, so I still felt crappy, but at least I wasn't attempting to hurl my intestines anymore. My wonderful hubby set me up on the futon with the game on even though by that point I could care less about it. I remember in my sort-of-conscious state attempting to yell, "Go, Go, Go!" to some Buckeye running down the field, and of course I was happy they won, but in the end I was truly thankful for being able to drink some tea and eat some crackers without seeing it all again a few minutes later.

So why am I reminiscing about that day? Because I realized that this year we will be traveling to pick up our kids on the day of the big game. We will probably already be at the airport when the game starts, and we'll be sitting in D.C. when it is over. I have something much more important in life to be concerned with on that day than whether the Buckeyes get embarrassed at the Big House. (I wasn't planning on them winning this year anyway.) It's kind of nice for life to provide this reality check for me. Sports and other entertainment are nice distractions, but I think it is important to remember that they are just that: entertaining distractions. I'm looking forward to the brand of entertainment our kids are going to provide. Of course, raising kids might also be seen as a sport. Too bad they don't come with a rules manual and a referree!

Ok, need to get back to packing and other trip projects. Only 10 more days!!

our carefree life. . .

So, we're leaving for Ethiopia in 2 weeks. 2 weeks. 15 days, actually. Strangely, it is both not soon enough and way too fast. A very odd feeling.

Let's see. . .travel arrangements have been made, and we have most of the additional paperwork ready (the paperwork NEVER stops! all you people out there who think you are done because you turned in your dossier, HA! keep that friendly notary at the bank on speed dial.) Some donations have been gathered, and I've even started packing some of them! Things are pretty much ready for the kids when they come home -- even car seats, thanks to their Auntie Jill and Uncle Eric. We will be able to drive them home from the airport in a legal and safe manner.

Things still to do: Get packed, get travel money, finish up a couple of remaining documents, put together a photo album and letter for birth relatives, get small gifts to give to orphanage workers, see about a flu shot, go to the eye doctor, contact our pediatrician, create a "how to take care of J while we're gone" manual, and prep my class for the sub taking over when I leave.

To top it all off, I have a cold and a cat who insists on pooping on the floor. (My apologies to those staying in our house while we are gone; there will be, more than likely, some poopy issues to deal with. The vet claims they did not find a physical illness, so we're trying different things. Unfortunately for us, Willoughby, and our carpet, dealing with it has to go on the backburner for now.)

There are, of course, all kinds of other things on the agenda: Getting LegoLand moved from the family room to J's bedroom, helping with homework, grading, teaching, double-header soccer game on Saturday, soccer banquet, department meeting, cleaning, never-ending laundry, J's eye appointment, and who knows what else. Sitting on an airplane for 17 hours straight sounds pretty good to me right now!

2 more weeks, 2 more weeks, 2 more weeks. . .

1+2=3

After an agonizing wait to hear court results, we finally received word on Tuesday afternoon that they are now officially our kids. We leave November 17th to go get them.

More later. Just wanted to finally get a pic up.

:)

go berg!

Tonight I am going to write about my friends. Some say we are a cult; others marvel at our staying power. I think we are simply blessed.

It all began our freshman year at Heidelberg -- way back in 1989/1990. We didn't all live in the same residence hall, although many us did call King Hall home. We didn't all study the same major. (Ok, we didn't all study.) Some pledged a sorority or a fraternity, and some played lacrosse. Some dated each other, and some chose to never consider this. It is difficult to pinpoint the one commonality that brought us together and kept us together. Sure, there were fights, and at least one person who didn't "make the cut" so to speak. But somehow, through graduation, moving across state lines, weddings, children, and even death, we have stayed glued as a unit of friendship and love. How many people can say that they have several college friends that they get together with 2-3 times a year? How many can say that when they leave those friends that they feel an overwhelming sense of blessing?

On Saturday, I got to feel it again. We all gathered at Becky's beautiful house in Cincy for both a donations party and just because it had been awhile since we had been together. Along with some great food and some great company, we were on the receiving end of some terrific orphanage donations and some presents for our kids. Becky and Sean went above and beyond with adorable clothes and some great donations for the House of Hope -- band-aids, soap, detergent packets, alcohol wipes, and toys. I think Eric and Jackie and Bradd and Jennifer had way too much fun getting toys and other donations for the kids at HoH. Tiffany and Rod presented us with crayons, sidewalk chalk, stuffed animals and more. Billie and Dave gave us some incredibly cute clothes -- especially the little girl jeans! And Jen. Jen is one who is almosted as excited as we are and it shows in how she gives of herself. Not only has she already given books/cds for the HoH, but she gave us more for the kids, and she has a large Lands End tote bag on order. To top it all off, she is coming to stay with J while we travel. Now, how can I possibly thank all of them for what they have done? How can I possibly express how much it means? I think the best I can do is return the favor when they need it in their own lives.

Unfortunately, there were a few members of our crew missing for various reasons, and we actually had to cut out early and head home instead of staying over like everyone else. Once again, as we traveled north on I-75 back to Columbus, I reflected on how incredible it is to have these friends in my life. How did I ever get so lucky?

Thanks guys. Love you all.

my guilt-filled hope

Our court date is Monday, October 29th. Of course, since Ethiopia is about 7 or 8 hours ahead of us, theoretically it could be done and over with by the time we wake up. (Well, maybe by the time I wake up; Mark wakes up at stupid o'clock.) So, we are literally hours away from our kids officially becoming our kids by Ethiopian law. This puts me in a really strange emotional place.

You see, Ethiopia requires a surviving birth parent or relative to come to the court hearing and affirm their written decision to place the children for adoption. From what we understand, court takes place in a large room with many people, and each case only takes a few minutes. Either our agency or our children's original orphanage will bring their birth parent/surviving relative in for the hearing -- actually go get them and bring them in.

So here is where I am. I find myself hoping and praying (ok, begging) that all goes well on Monday. Then I realize what I am hoping and praying for: For a loved one to make the supreme sacrifice. I then become racked with guilt. It is so hard to acknowledge the incredible loss that the children and their family are experiencing; however, it has to be acknowledged and we must deal with the grief. I know that it was the awful misfortunes of life that put these 2 beautiful kids in need of a home and parents. Our desire to adopt and be parents didn't create the situation. I totally understand that, but it doesn't keep my heart from hurting any less. So how do I reconcile this? How do I pray and plead for the adoption to sail through court knowing that it means pain and loss for their family? It is, in many ways, an awful position to be in. What I will try to do is focus on the kids and what this will mean for them -- a chance to move past the loss and have a safe, permanent, loving home with two parents, a big brother and an ornery cat. Like almost everything else in adoption, right now I have no control over what happens. I guess I can only ask for it to happen the way it is meant to happen.

So, while you are keeping your fingers crossed for us, please keep the birth family in your thoughts and prayers as well, sending them courage, strength and faith.

strangely calm

At what point do I start freaking out? Should we take a poll? For some odd reason I'm doing pretty well.

I am trying to be very good about taking one step at a time. Yesterday, I contacted a travel agent who has a lot of experience with Ethiopian adoption, so I got that ball rolling. Today, I made some copies of our passports and necessary immigration paperwork. Tomorrow I plan to get a couple of those docs notarized, get my flu shot, and renew my driver's license. (It expires in December, and I don't even want to think about trying to to renew it after we come home.)
Then, later this week, we'll have a phone conversation with our agency regarding travel and any questions we have. I feel like once we get the important absolutely-must-do things out of the way that we can start concentrating on packing.

Packing.

The good thing is that there is a ton of resources and packing lists on the internet to help do this. The bad thing is that there is a ton of resources and packing lists on the internet to help you do this. I want to be organized about this -- I really do. It's part of my nature. But some of the things just boggle my mind. One person talked about sticking things into all the empty spaces, like inside shoes -- and her hotpot. HOTPOT??!!??

You see, I really only want to take what we need. I know there are many things we can take that would be nice and helpful (like a hotpot) and everyone has their opinions about such things, but I am finding myself simply overwhelmed with the suggestions on some of these lists.

I think I am also having one of those days where I feel like we as Americans just have too much crap in our lives that we can't seem to live without. I'll stop there or I may go off on a tangent and rant and rave for awhile.

Anyway, I know there are still things I need to get for the kids before we travel -- more diapers and wipes, lotion, more clothes for little brother, some slip on shoes, etc., etc. But I am forcing myself to wait until I get to that step before I makes lists and buy stuff.

So when do I freak out? Oh, could be any day now. I'll be sure to let you know when it happens.
:)

in through the nose, out through the mouth. . .

. . . in through the nose, out through the mouth. Time to start using those deep breathing exercises. We got the call that we have been waiting for since September, 10. Our court date.

We're scheduled for Oct. 29th. Everybody out there keep your fingers, toes, arms, legs, eyes, and any other body part you are capable of crossing, crossed. (If you happen to have a body crossing skill that you would like to share, please do. We won't think you're weird or anything. Promise.)

Anyway, this means that we can plan to travel a few weeks after that and have been told to expect to go either the week of November 18 (week of Thanksgiving) or the following week on the 25th. For those of you keeping score, this means that our kids will be home in time for Christmas!!!! Don't worry, we will not go overboard with presents for them. First of all, that's not our style. (Somewhere along the line, J decided that you should only put 3 wishes on your Christmas list for Santa. I have chosen not to correct this notion.) Second, I think it would really overwhelm them to suddenly be inundated with more things. It will be hard enough for them to adjust to the regular everyday toys and such that we have for them, but I think to then give them a mountain of presents would totally freak them out.

So, now we have to get ourselves ready. I'm trying to kind of keep things in perspective, so I have been reminding myself that even if we get on the plane with just our paperwork, some money, and the clothes on our back, we could survive. Since I plan to pack a tad more than that, I think we'll be fine. This strategy doesn't always take away the paranoia and anxiety of not being prepared, but it can help at times.

We also learned that a few other families have the same court date, so we will probably be part of a small travel group there. That will be nice.

Can. Not. Wait. To. Go.

In through the nose (sniiiifffff) out through the mouth (whooooooo.) Repeating as often as necessary.

end of the week mumbles

We have an interesting family gathering planned for the weekend. It's going to be a sad good time.

We're heading to Tiffin, Ohio (Go Berg!!) to celebrate the lives of Aunt Dee and Grandma Herbert. Aunt Dee made her way to the other side a few years ago, but her ashes have yet to be buried. Grandma left us just a few weeks ago, and her ashes will be buried in the same cemetery as Aunt Dee's. So, we will have a somewhat melancholy afternoon.

After that, we are doing some delayed birthday celebrating: Brother-in-law turned 30 in September, M is now 40, and J just became 8. We also have some new family members -- one who is actually here already!

In addition to the many emotions of the day, my Buckeyes are playing Michigan State in the afternoon. Oy! I think I should just ignore the game. Why bring frustration into the emotional mix? (Jen K. don't call me if your spartans win. email is fine.)

Looking forward to some time strolling around Heidelberg on a beautiful fall day and stirring up some memories. (Did I really graduate 14 years ago?!?)

By the way, still waiting for a court date. I did contact our coordinator today to make sure she calls our cell phones and not our home phone -- something I generally recommend to anyone who truly wants to reach us. The home phone isn't connected to an answering machine, and it isn't always answered. It's our way of avoiding pollsters, fundraisers, robo-callers, etc. So, hopefully now I don't have to worry about missing that very important phone call.

Went Halloween shopping with J today. He has been saying for weeks that he wants to be a knight, but then he changed his mind and now doesn't know. We've got 2 more weeks, right? We did manage to buy some candy. Have you noticed how you practically need a home equity loan to buy Halloween candy? -- especially if you live in a large neighborhood with lots of kids. We ran out last year! Yikes! I do love Halloween, though. What other night do you get cute little kids dressed up like pumpkins followed by scary school-aged vampires? Oh, and you just gotta love the almost-teenagers who try to look cool by not really dressing up but still wanting to go around and get candy. Or, better yet, the grown-ups who claim they are getting some for their sick kid at home. Uh huh. I think they should still have to wear a costume.

:)
go buckeyes!
go tribe!
go berg! (hey, they've won at least 2 games this year.)

october 16, 1999

Starting around, oh, August or so, our son became impatient for his birthday to arrive. For at least 2 months we have been listening to Whiny Impatient Boy fuss about having to wait for his birthday. (It does not help that dad's b-day comes a week before his. Life is sooo unfair.) While he has been excited to turn 8 years old, it really has been about the present. Those who know J know that he is a Lego fanatic, and he would be perfectly fine with only ever receiving Legos for presents for the rest of his life. Ok, maybe childhood. We'll see.

This year the plan was to give him one present -- a large lego set. He pretty much knew that this is what he would get, but he didn't know which one. Would it be the Harry Potter 5 castle set? Mars Mission? AquaRaiders? Oh, the agony of having to wait!! We decided we would spread his birthday out a bit and do most of the celebrating over the weekend. Originally, the plan was to do things on Sunday, but decided it was in our own best interests to give him his present on Saturday. (HP castle, btw.)

On Sunday, after church, we headed to Polaris to meet up with our new pals Kevin and Stacie. We had the pleasure of meeting their incredibly adorable son, Micah. Micah is one of those yummy-cute babies -- you know the ones. They are just so dang cute, cuddly and sweet that you would skip dessert just so you can kiss their chubby cheeks and blow raspberries on their bellies. Yep, that's Micah. His mom and dad were nice enough to show us more pics of their trip to Ethiopia and tell us stories about our kids.

After a trip to Sugardaddy's and some lunch, we took J to Magic Mountain for a round of mini golf, and eventually we ended up at McDonald's (yuck!) for J's birthday dinner. Now, can you guess what J asked his pastry chef dad to make him for his birthday dessert?? Sugardaddy's brownies? Noooo. A birthday cake?? Negative. How about some cupcakes? An ice cream cake? A giant cookie?? No, no, and no. He requested Rice Krispy Treats. (M, of course, had to at least jazz up a batch by throwing some CoCo Puffs in there.)

So now my hubby is 40 and my sweet boy is 8. I think that makes me old, but I'm going to pretend otherwise.
:)

news you can use, if you wanna

A very cool discovery: The federal adoption tax credit is PER CHILD. Yeeeee Haawwwww!!!

(If you are unfamiliar with this, it is just under $11,000 and can be rolled over into the next tax year if you can't take it all in the current year. )

A "sweet" announcement: October 30th, Food Network, Throwdown with Bobby Flay, Sugardaddy's. Tune in to see how M's brownies did against the famous Mr. Flay. Then go online to www.sugardaddys.com and buy lots o' sweeties. Yum Yum!

Lack of news: Nothing to report on the adoption front. Still waiting for a court date. twiddle thumbs, tap foot, fidget, fidget, fidget.

October 9, 1967

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY DEAR HUBBA HUBBA HONEY!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

(Imagine this being sung very loudly and very badly.)

The 30s have left the building! It is on to a new decade for the chef. (No, I will not bake him a birthday cake. Are you kidding??)

Happy 40th birthday my honey!

wowee wow wow wow!

MORE referrals have been announced! CHI announced that they had 4 more referrals today -- all girls -- including a set of twins! The twins are 9 months old, another baby is 6 months, and the other is 6 weeks! This is all just crazy exciting! This is in addition to the baby boy recently referred and the two girls referred a couple of weeks ago. I guess we're not alone waiting for a court date!

Now for a personal update:

I took the 2nd typhoid vacc a half an hour ago. So far, so good.

Also, I snagged a great resource today. I have two Ethiopian students, and I discovered that one of them works in a salon and does hair. Yippee! I asked her if she would teach me how to do our daughter's hair and how to take care of it. She told me to call her when we come home with her and to bring her into the salon. Many of you pale pasty people out there may wonder why this is such a big deal. I'll tell you why. African hair is different from Caucasian hair and needs different care and styling. Considering I suck at doing my own hair, the thought of trying to keep my daughter's hair pretty has me a bit stressed. I have been doing plenty of reading and researching, but nothing will prepare me like actually doing it and having someone help me. So, a big thanks goes to Feven and her Ethiopian hair care expertise. (Now I have another student I have to try to grade impartially!)

what's in our fridge

Just wanted to report that I took my first typhoid capsule yesterday. So far, so good -- no noticeable reaction. Next one on Friday.

On a funny note:

I opened the fridge this morning and noticed only one box of the typhoid vacc. We have two and they are supposed to stay refridgerated. I started moving things around searching for it and getting a little panicky. Finally, I found where M had moved it, and all was well. Then I started thinking about how funny it all was. "Omigosh! Where's our other box of Typhoid!!" To be worried about not having 2 boxes of TYPHOID in our fridge just cracked me up.

Geez. The things you go through with IA.

On a happy note:

Congrats to CHI family Paul and Deedra Mager! They just received a referral for a 2.5 month-old baby boy in Ethiopia. Yea!! Can't wait to see pics!

one in each arm!

Just got back and wanted to do my dutiful reporting of getting vaccinated for our trip.
(First, I want to say that our nurse at Life Care Alliance was awesome! Gotta like anyone who gives shots and is called "Painless Papp" -- Papp is her last name.)

Ok, so I got the meningitis vacc in my right arm and barely felt a thing. Yellow Fever went in the left arm, and it had a bit of a sting to it. Actually it stung quite a bit, but it seemed to take awhile for it to develop -- kind of like eating Mexican food.

Brought home the oral Typhoid vacc. and will take that over the next week. Considering what some of the side effects may be, I think I will keep my reaction to that one to myself.

Gotta find my "to do" list and mark this off. What a relief!

Shot day

Several months ago, M and I started working on getting our Hep A & B shots. We still have one round to go, but I'm wondering if we'll end up traveling before we get to take it.

Today, however, we're going for different shots: Yellow Fever, Typhoid and Meningitis. Having a low pain threshold (in other words, I'm a wimp) I'm not too excited about this. It's not that I'm afraid of shots. I'm afraid of pain.

I may actually get the pill version of the Typhoid vacc. It's good for 5 years compared to 2 for the shot, and there is a good chance that I will be traveling to Nicaragua within those 5 years. (We have friends and family who travel to places like Australia, England and Scotland; we go to Ethiopia and Nicaragua. Hmmm. . . )

One piece of advice for anyone needing to get travel vaccs: Shop around! Seriously. I checked out various county health departments and clinics and found that some have higher priced vaccs, some have admin fees, some only do certain vaccs and not others. We're going to Life Care Alliance here in Columbus -- low prices, no admin fees, and free consults before the shots.

Ok, wish us luck! If you hear this strange howling sound followed by painful crying, it might just be me on the west side of Cols. I'll let everyone know how it goes!

retail therapy

I'm not a big shopper. Every so often I get the urge. If I wait a few moments the urge passes, and then shopping returns to being a chore.

Well, one thing I have been looking forward to since we got our referral is going out and shopping for my daughter. Now, I have to say that I am not one who has always had this longing to go out and buy pink frilly dresses and shiny clicky-clacky shoes. I didn't dream about the day that I could wander out of the boy world of Star Wars pajamas and into that of Strawberry Shortcake underwear. Actually, I really didn't mind not having to go into all that is lavender and pink. But something happens when they call you and tell you that you have a little girl. And when you see picture after picture of her wearing a prized pink coat that she seems to never want to take off, well, that changes everything. Everything changes when you realize that you will soon bring home a little girl and you have nothing in her closet to dress her in.

So it had to be done. I went shopping.
Here's what I got:

8 pairs of pants
7 shirts
5 sweaters
8 fleece shirts
5 dresses
6 pairs of socks
1 set of pajamas
1 pair of overalls
1 sweatshirt (her first OSU sweatshirt!)
1 warm jacket
1 winter coat (I'm sure it is waaay too big.)
1 raincoat (incredibly cute)
1 pair of snow boots

Grand total for all of the above?? (drum roll please. . . )

$64.38 Yep. Sixty-four dollars and thirty-eight cents.

(This total does not include the underwear and additional socks purchased separately.)

Still need to get some shoes, but I don't know her shoe size. Also need hat and gloves, some undershirts, and at least one more set of pj's or nightgown. But hey, I'm making progress. Also still need to do a bit for little brother, but he's got hand-me-downs from big brother so the situation is not as desperate. Shopping for someone you haven't met yet can be really hard, but when it is for your new daughter it can be so much fun.

Somehow, though, I imagine that "fun" is going to change a bit once she's home and wanting to go shopping herself. Yikes!

school daze, school daze . . .

So the Fall Quarter just started last week, and I am teaching my usual ESL composition class. The twenty available spots filled up fairly quickly, and that always gives me a great advantage: Turning students away. Yes, I know that sounds mean, but when you have to correct the essays and tests of 20 non-native speakers, the work gets a bit tedious. I used to be really wimpy and sign everybody in -- I was such a pushover. Now, however, I am really good at firmly saying "no" and not getting suckered by sob stories. ("Please please please! I really need to get into this class because I have to work in the afternoons and I can only get childcare in the mornings and I'll lose all my financial aid and I really really need this class and. . .and. . .and")

As usual, the first day of class was a hectic one, parking was atrocious, and nothing really seemed to go as planned. Then, of course, I had that one student come up to me at the end of class and admit that she wasn't actually signed into my class, and could I please sign her in?? I started with my standard firm response, and she countered with a story about time/childcare/work conflict. I don't really remember what it was. So, I was weak and I gave in. I took her blue registration form and started signing it, and then asked what country she was from.

Ethiopia.

Ha! I just smiled and said, "Well, you should have told me that first!"

Since that day, we have had some nice conversations, and she seems excited to help me learn about Addis Ababa. Today she helped me with the pronunciation and meaning of our daughter's name, and we talked about hotels, food and children in Ethiopia. She also asked me why we had chosen Ethiopia. I told her the whole story.

You know, I've always believed that certain people come into your life at certain times for certain reasons. This is a great time for Ekram to come into mine. Now I just have to try to be unbiased when I grade her papers. :)

wal-mart. bleh.

Ok, I'm going to come out and admit that I'm not a big fan of wal-mart but will occasionally shop there for convenience sake. It's closer than our nearest Target or Meijer, nicer than the Meijer, and better stocked than the Target. Fortunately, they are building a new Meijer closer to us, so we will have an option.

But this post is specifically about the baby doll aisle in our local wal-mart. Having a 3-year-old daughter on the way has me keeping an eye out for baby dolls, so after checking out the legos (yes, more legos) I walked around the toy department a bit. I found a whole aisle of pinky, girly, froo-froo (is that how you spell it?) doll babies and their accessories -- a little girl's dream come true. If she's white. Not so much if she's brown. You see, in this whole aisle of dolls, the only ones of color that I could find were these little miniature Cabbage Patch dolls, and they were toward the back of the shelf behind the miniature white CP dolls. In addition, there were only 4 of these mini dolls of color, and they seemed to be Asian and Hispanic/Latina. So, I stood back and looked again up and down the aisle. No brown babies. I couldn't believe it.

For those without brown children, maybe this isn't such a big deal, and maybe it's one of those things you never have to think about. As a white mother to 3 brown children, it's a huge deal.

My first thought was, well, we are out here in the rural burbs of Columbus. But, if you just walk around that particular wal-mart, you will see MANY people of color -- and not just African Americans. You would think they would do a better job of representing their customers.

But, then again, I did hear that the Walton family has fallen down on the list of the richest American families. Very sad, I know. Hmmmm. . . maybe they should try stocking more brown doll babies. Just a thought.

One of the great things about Ethiopian adoption is that other families travel ahead of you to get their kids, and they take pictures and get to know the other kids that are there. As a result, we have been in touch with a few other families who have already met our two cuties. Not only have they sent us pictures, but we have gained valuable insight into the personalities of our newest children.

For example, we have learned that our daughter is the happiest little girl in the world, and our young son tends to take life in stride. We've also learned that it's a good thing that chocolate is a staple in our house. Boy, is she going to loooove her daddy's job!

Of course, getting all of this information has been wonderful, but it also makes the wait more agonizing. Gee, I thought it was hard to wait for referral! It's nothing compared to waiting to travel! Ugh! Can those darn courts please reopen??? At lease when we get through court we can officially introduce them here on the blog. Until then, we have to talk in code and keep pictures a secret. (I understand and agree with it, but it's still hard.)

We have lots to do -- including things we don't really want to do, like get more shots -- and we somehow have to keep our head in the game and continue to do all the regular, mundane stuff life requires us to do. Like work. And eat. And breathe.

I think I need a nap. . .

a language lesson from J

Driving J home from the eye doctor the other day and he asked if anyone at the orphanage spoke English. I told him that, yes, there were people who spoke English at the House of Hope, the transition home where our two children are living until we can go get them. He was hoping that they were teaching the 3-year-old some English, and I assured him that she was probably learning a few words.

J: Maybe they will teach her to say "ooh-la-la."
Me: Now, why would they teach her that?
J: Oh, you're right. That's French.

My multilingual child.

the whole reason this blog was created. . . .

. . . was to announce our referral when it finally came.

It finally came.

On Monday, September 10, 2007, we received THE call that presented us with the opportunity to become parents to a 3-year-old girl and her 14-month-old baby brother in Ethiopia. With one phone call, we have tripled the number of children we parent. We couldn't be more excited or happier.

Due to Ethiopian law, we are not allowed to post pictures or give identifying information until the children legally become ours in Ethiopian court. Unfortunately, courts are closed for the rainy season until early October. (Yes, Ethiopia has a rainy season.) I imagine that we'll be able to travel either by the end of the year or the beginning of 08. Just my guess; no official word on that.

While I can't post any pics or info, I can tell you how absolutely beautiful they are. Yes, we are biased, but it's the truth! With big, gorgeous brown eyes and smiles that melt your heart, we tend to turn into puddles of emotional goo with each picture we receive. Even J isn't immune. Upon hearing the news of his new siblings, he jumped around yelling, "Yes! Yes! That's exactly what I wanted!" He's even excited to have a sister! He is sooo happy to finally become a big brother.

So, after prepping for China for 5-6 months, sitting in line with China for 14 months, taking about 4 months to get our dossier to Ethiopia, and then waiting a whopping 2.5 weeks for our referral of two beautiful kiddos, I think we made the right move. What do you think??

The spirit moves in mysterious ways. . .

time to embarrass our child

One of the great things about being a parent is that your children provide you with endless hours of entertainment. It makes you wonder what the heck you did to amuse yourself before the wee ones came along. Take this story, for instance. . .

We have finished with dinner, and the hubby and I are still sitting at the table. J has sprinted to the family room -- a room that should probably just be called the Lego room as it usually looks like LegoLand has exploded in there. Anyway, it doesn't take long for our dear son to go running into the bathroom, spitting and sputtering along the way.

Me: "What's wrong?"

My traumatized child: "I found something on the floor that I thought was chocolate, but when I put it in my mouth it was cat poop!" (something brown is smudged on his t-shirt; big tears well up in his eyes.)

Me: "Cat poop! What are you doing picking up things off the floor and sticking them in your mouth?!?"

My still traumatized child: "But I blew on it!" (I think the 5 second rule was waaaayyy expired on that one.)

So, dear hubby takes dear child upstairs to help with the brushing and rinsing, while I did some investigating. Anyone with a cat knows that cat poop is fairly stinky and generally not something you would confuse with chocolate. After doing a quick sweep around the LegoLand family room and finding nothing resembling or smelling like kitty crap, I went into the bathroom. Seeing watery streaks of brown on the sink, I knew that this was not cat poop. Checked the wastebasket and found the offending brown blob, took it out and gave it a whiff. It was a chocolate candy. Probably an old chocolate candy, but definitely chocolate candy.

I took it upstairs to reassure J that it was not kitty poop that he had tasted. There was much relief and laughter by all.

Later, before we all headed up for bed, I took a few minutes to clean out the litter box. "Hey," I called out, " there's a whole bunch of chocolate in kitty's box!"

Eeeeewwwwww!!!!

melissa fay greene: you rock!

For anyone with any mild interest, nagging curiosity, or hopeful dreams about Ethiopian adoption, please go here. Melissa Fay Greene has a wonderful book called There Is No Me Without You, which is now in paperback so go buy it, and she now also has a blog. If you do nothing else but go to the blog and play the 4 minute slideshow on the front page, you will make me your biggest fan and make yourself more informed.

Ok. That's all I'm going to say. Have loads more I want to say, but I would rather have you hightail it over to her site. So go. Now.

presenting miss abigail

Our newest niece has finally arrived. I guess I shouldn't say "finally" because she came a little earlier than expected but still full term. Little Miss Abigail decided that she wanted to enter this world on Sept. 2, which just happened to be the birthday of her late grandmother. Little Miss Abigail also decided she did not want to turn upside down, so she tried to make her grand entrance ass first. As most know, that is not a good idea. So, when her mama (M's sister and my seester-in-law) started having contractions, and the doctor decided that, yes, the baby was attempting to be birthed, a c-section was in order. And then, Voila!, here she is! All 6 pounds of her! Welcome to the World, Baby Girl! (title of a Fanny Flagg book.)

Ok, so for all of you out there paying attention, let's look at some numbers.

On M's side of the family, there are now 6 grandchildren. 2 boys, 4 girls. (btw, J is not pleased with the gender imbalance!)

On C's side of the family, there are 13 grandchildren, and 6 great-grandchildren. So far I can still name them all, but I can't tell you their birthdays.

In addition to Miss Abigail's birth, I would also like to congratulate my student, Abdou, on the birth of his first child. Abdou had to wait patiently to hear word from his wife in Dakar, Senegal about the arrival of their son, Abdoulaye, named after Abdou's late father.

Yea for babies!!

I hate tv

July 1997. That was the last time we had cable. For those of you with horrid math skills like mine, that was 10 years ago. For the last 10 years, we have accessed local tv stations using our rabbit ears atop (or beside or hanging off the edge) of our television. We basically get about 6 channels in well: nbc, abc, cbs, fox, pbs and whatever channel 53 is. Honestly, when it is on, it is usually tuned to pbs. Josh loves pbskids, and we tend to be fans of shows like "This Old House" and the occasional documentary. The other channels get used for finding out the weather and watching sports.

When our tv died earlier in the year, we refused to give in to the super-duper-flat-screen-hang-it-on-your-wall-because-it's-so-cool-and-everybody's-got-one Best Buy marketing ploy. We had the perfect excuse to give into those material desires -- our tv was dead! Here's why we didn't:

1) Those puppies aren't cheap, and when you are adopting, you don't spend money on fancy-schmancy gadgets.
2) We would have felt compelled to sign up for digital/cable/satellite/whatever. Let me tell ya, it's really hard to pay for something when you haven't paid for it for TEN YEARS!
3) We don't want to become tv junkies, which we probably would just to justify paying for the tv and the cable.

So M went out and replaced our dead tv with a super cheapo brand of tv that I had never heard of. Nothing flat about it. And to get pbs in we have to use the tuner in the vcr, so the tv is always set on channel 3 and we use the vcr to turn channels. We made this purchase knowing that the day will come when we will need to give in, break down, and join the digital world. If we didn't have a child in love with pbs, I would be tempted just to chuck the thing out the window and not have a tv at all.

But if I did that, then I wouldn't be able to watch Big Ten football. Oh wait. I CAN'T DO THAT ANYMORE!!! Why? Because they went and created something called The Big Ten Network and now they can't even get cable companies into agreement. Idiots. I will admit my first reaction was, "Omigod -- where do we sign up??" How can I not watch Buckeye football? I enjoy games from other conferences and schools, but they can't replace my Buckeyes and Big Ten games. But then I thought about it a little more. How many other people are panicking about losing their free access to Big Ten sports? How much money are they going to make by making us all pay to see the game? Why should they have all the power? Screw them. I'm turning on my radio. So far, it's still free.

"what would I do with a boy?"

We once had a former sister-in-law say this. I remember being struck dumb by that statement and not knowing what to say. The fact is, though, that most people have particular wants and desires when it comes to their children -- boy, girl, hair color, etc. When you adopt, you actually get to choose some of these things.

When we adopted J, we had no gender preference; just wanted as young as possible. With him being our first, we wanted to experience as much of infancy as we could. We also knew how important the first 3 years of life are with regards to development, and the thought of having a toddler was a little frightening. So, getting J at just shy of 8 months old was wonderful.

Fast forward to 2005. We're trying to choose our country. China or Colombia? China: 95% baby girls, referrals in 6 months. Colombia: both genders, age of child dependent on age of parents, referrals 18-24 months. We really agonized over the decision, but in the end felt we again should go for as young as possible (ayap). Referrals in 6 months was another bonus. So, China here we come.

Fast forward again to spring 2007. At this point, we still didn't have our referral from China. By April of 07 we were at 14 months of waiting -- and that was just from when we were logged in there. The wait was terrible, but it did something for us. It made us realize that we were at a different place on the adoption spectrum. Surprise referrals for boys started popping up from China, and there were people freaking out. Hey, they chose China specifically because they wanted a girl, dammit! We sat here thinking, "We'll take him! We'll take him!" And then, others were concerned about ages. There seemed to be some babies being referred that were (gasp!) older than 12 months. Hmmm. . . . we thought. We could handle that, too. We started realizing that we were open to more than just a baby girl.

When our agency began their Ethiopia program, we started talking about a 3rd child. Now, keep in mind that when we got married, we had always hoped for more than 2 kids. When it became apparent that we would be lucky to have just one, 2 sounded pretty good. With this new program, the idea of a 3rd child suddenly became a real possibility. With so many orphans needing homes, Ethiopia has babies, toddlers, school-agers and teenagers waiting for families. They are boys and girls. Sib sets and singles.

So, we switched. It is, of course, very possible that we may come home with an infant daughter, just like we would have if we had stayed with China. That's ok. I'm a true believer that we all have the children we are meant to have. But, I will be at peace knowing that we opened the door a little wider. Having requested 1-2 children of either gender between the ages of 0-36 months, I have wrestled with all the possible referrals we may get and have come away feeling ready for anything. (M says we are adjusting our defense -- going to a zone coverage.) It's really hard to prepare when you don't know what is coming, but hey, we're sure to have more time than we had for J -- a whopping 5 days.

We could get our referral at any time. Hard to say when. If I could still do cartwheels, I would be outside embarrassing myself and my boys. So, instead, I'm just going to dream about what may come. And do some laundry. And grade some papers. And clean the house. And somehow keep myself occupied.